Friday, September 19, 2014

Roy and I went to the Dr. Yesterday. Sence I broke my arm I have been off chemotherapy.well here it is 8weeks later.time to start up chemotherapy again..but instead of going back on chemotherapy the cancer has spread any is out of control. Long story short. If I don't do chemotherapy I have 1 month to live, with chemotherapy I have 1to 2 months. So we opted to not do any chemotherapy..I had no idea that I had such a short amount of time lift. However a few nights ago I was awaken with the filling that I was coming to the end of my life..I am ok with this, I just fill so bad for my family. I know I have said that we believe in God and that families can be together for all eternity. This time that we have here on this earth is just a class room, time for US to learn more about him and a time to learn how to be more loving, kind and excepting. I am not afraid of being dead but I am worried about going through the dieing process. Oh well. We want will take it day by day, min by min and. We have total trust in the Lord and that is what we will go by

Friday, September 5, 2014

Hum...How do you react to news, like you have 6 months to 1 year to live. And also my Dr. Said that she was being generous with her timing. She also told us that cancer likes to come back with a vengeance when you go off chemotherapy. Because of my broken arm I will be off chemotherapy for a full month or more. Because of the poor timing of my life I will go back on chemotherapy but one of the meds will not be given to me because of the side effects I had with it before. They feel that it was the cause of the weakness witch caused my fall. Let's hope and pray that this time it will work and I will have some what a good quality of life. It is rather mind blowing, thinking that I might be dead in less than 6  6months. I have been thinking of what I want to do with the time that I do have and the crazy thing is that all I want to do is go to Germany and see our son and daughter in law and our 4grandkids that are there. A nd to see and spend time with the family that is here but to also live my life as I have been. My family my means everything to me and I just hope that all of them know how much I love them.I have 19grandkids who I adore. I wish could be here for their weddings and to see my great grandkids. I know that families can be together in heaven and that is a comfort and blessing to me. So don't mourn or be sad for me because we will see each other and be together again. I love you all